FAQs

Let me answer some of your questions!

Questions and Answers.

Q: Can you describe the process of selecting traits?

A: We all belong to the human genome and the behavior traits discussed in this book, Wiring, can be experienced by both men and women. However, over the thirty-four years of observing repeating patterns of behavior, I noticed that women demonstrated certain behavior traits more often than men and men demonstrated a different set of behaviors more often than women. The top five behavior traits that consistently showed up for women and the top five traits for men were selected. The other key to my selection was that the reason these traits were showing up in my therapy practice so consistently was because they were, for both women and men, undermining their lives.

Q: What does it mean if I resonate with both the female and the male behavior traits?

A: Many people resonate with both sets of traits. Rest assured that this is quite normal. There are two major concepts that need to be explained; first, whether you are born with the XX chromosome or the XY chromosome, you are also influenced by very strong archetypal energy fields; yin, yang or a combination of yin and yang. In book one we will begin the exploration of these energy fields and see their influence primarily with the male. The second major influence is explained and demonstrated in book two – the consequence of the order of your birth. Quite extraordinary!

Q: Aren’t you concerned about gender?

A: All three books are written with a deep compassion for not only the current discussions around gender, but strives to encompass all races and cultures. The concepts, the shapers of human behavior are universal and therefore include everyone. In book one, we look at behavior traits from the perspective of continuums. These continuums covey the reality that each of us will locate ourselves somewhere on the continuum; some will resonate strongly with the trait, many will line up in the vast middle and some will not resonate much. Book two will offer a great deal of understanding, around the phenomenon currently being expressed – why a female child (XX chromosome) may resonate more with her brothers and a boy child (XY chromosome) may express behavior traits similar to his sisters. This current phenomenon is actually quite natural and has always been part of our normal yet diverse expression of our humanness. We just have not understood where it comes from and how it shapes us.

Q: Mary Kate is the main female character in your narrative, where did the name come from?

A: Mary Kate is a composite character – she represents the expression of the five survival traits expressed consistently by many of my female clients. She represents both the old (ancient traits) and the new (our ability to be aware and to step over these ancient traits).  The first part of her name, Mary, refers to the older, yet highly respected aspects of ourselves. Kate refers to the new cutting edge of our thinking and our capacity to change the old form when it no longer serves. My niece, Katie, is such a person for whom I have so much admiration.

Q: Steeped in a Jungian orientation towards Psyche, it seems like your roots in the biological sciences would be conflictual. How do you hold both?

A: At first glance Jungian Archetypal psychology and the biological sciences would seem to be wildly different approaches to Psyche. Yet, I have found that both work well together. The first book on wiring reveals the strong influence of survival traits (biology) while mythology (archetypal stories) confirms through timeless stories that many of our biological responses are universal.  Post Jungian, James Hillman thought myths express our collective psychology, our universal responses which turn out to be behaviors embedded in our traits.

Q: Why is mythology important?

A: Mythology, Legends and Fairy Tales are often dramatic stories that convey meaning or teach us about ourselves and what it means to be human. They are meant to be full of drama and intrigue to pull us, the audience, into their trance. At the same time, these old universal tales describe the challenges of being human, they offer insight to our universal psychological processes as we will see so clearly in the story of Psyche, Parsifal and Poseidon.

Q: You use the terms yin and yang replacing the Jungian terms feminine and masculine, what inspired that shift?

A: This shift felt a bit risky since our culture is psychologically oriented and familiar with the terms feminine and masculine. While we may know that men can be feminine and women can be masculine, these terms can be confusing, dismissive and even erosive to the process of self inquiry. Since one of my goals is clarity, I took the leap. The concepts of yin and yang are appealing in that they are less confusing and they beautifully articulate energy dynamics that are a significant part of one’s personal configuration. For example, a person (male or female) influenced by yin energy has a tendency to be more circumspect, introspective, easy going, less aggressive. A person (female or male) influenced by yang energy has a tendency to be assertive, action-oriented, a doer and potentially impatient. Book one begins this discussion while book two will deepen our understanding of these powerful fields of energy that shape our responses.

Q: Can you explain The Theory of Original Configuration?

A: Original Configuration strives to demonstrate that before you were born you had an invisible substructure in place that would shape your personality. It is a way to understand the power of our biological wiring – specifically survival behavioral traits – and our energy template (yin or yang: introvert or extrovert, assertive or receptive) in shaping our core orientation and how we respond. Understanding these two influential systems allows for an enormous increase in self-awareness and perhaps as important, an understanding of others. For example, when clients understand that their partner is yin and they are yang – the lights can go on. There is a powerful comprehension – they move differently in the world.

Interested in resources for further reading?

There are a handful of books that I have resonated with and I am happy to share them!

E.O. Wilson is an author that had such a fine mind and keen understanding of both man and nature. His book, On Human Nature, is full of his wisdom. 

Michael P. Ghiglieri, a primatologist, professor and writer, lays out an un-flinching view of the consequences of the brutal evolutionary forces on mankind in his riveting book, The Dark Side of Man.  It is most compelling!

Sapiens A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari, is a well-researched, intelligent and highly engaging book that beautifully articulates our early years as one of many developing species of Hominids. A small example pulled from page 40: “(…) our present day social and psychological characteristics were shaped during this long (tens of thousands of years) pre-agricultural era. (…) we need to delve into the hunter-gather world that shaped us, the world that we subconsciously still inhabit.”  Another very compelling book.

  Kindred: Neanderthal Life, Love, Death and Art by Rebecca Wragg Sykes is both poetic and endearing in her well researched account of these amazing beings – our kindred. She brings an extraordinarily compassionate voice for the large-brained, healers or the Neanderthals who have shaped human history. Consider her words from page 34: “We are the embodied heritage of all our mothers. The predecessors of your eyes focusing on these words first saw light over 500 million years ago (Ma). The five dexterous fingers moving these pages have clutched, grasped, scrabbled for 300 million years. (…) The brain processing this sentence had ballooned almost to its current size by 500 ka, and was shared by the Neanderthals.”